{"id":272,"date":"2013-07-22T03:52:49","date_gmt":"2013-07-22T03:52:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/?page_id=272"},"modified":"2013-07-22T03:52:49","modified_gmt":"2013-07-22T03:52:49","slug":"chapter-63","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/story\/chapter-63\/","title":{"rendered":"Chapter 63"},"content":{"rendered":"

Chapter 63<\/span><\/b><\/p>\n

If I had to pick one word that defined my entire life, I actually could.\u00a0 I bet people would think that\u2019s weird, to be able to sum up your whole life with one word.\u00a0 I don\u2019t think anyone else in the group could, to be honest.\u00a0 But me?\u00a0 Yes, I can do it.\u00a0 Maybe that just says something about me.\u00a0 Probably not in a good way.\u00a0 But anyways, if someone asked me to, I\u2019d be able to within a heartbeat.\u00a0 You know what it would be?<\/i><\/p>\n

It would be \u201cWhy?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve asked this so many times in my life.\u00a0 Far too many, actually.<\/i><\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a few that came up pretty often:<\/i><\/p>\n

Why did my mom have to die?\u00a0 Why can\u2019t I find someone when my brothers can?\u00a0 Why don\u2019t people understand me?\u00a0 Why did this happen?\u00a0 Why is this story important?\u00a0 Why are the people supposed to care?\u00a0 Why can\u2019t I let people in?\u00a0 Why do people not realize how important my career is to me?<\/i><\/p>\n

Or, here are a few more recent ones:<\/i><\/p>\n

Why did the world have to end this way?\u00a0 Why did so many have to die?\u00a0 Why did they have to reanimate as zombies?\u00a0 Why did someone have to do this?\u00a0 Why can\u2019t we find anyone?\u00a0 Why does Nick care the way he does about me?\u00a0 Why couldn\u2019t I have let people in before this happened?\u00a0 Why didn\u2019t I appreciate what I had?<\/i><\/p>\n

Why?<\/i><\/p>\n

Why?<\/i><\/p>\n

Why?<\/i><\/p>\n

I hate not having the answers.\u00a0 I hate knowing that I may never get any.\u00a0 That just goes against my every fiber.\u00a0 I just, I like to know things.\u00a0 I like to have a plan, a goal.\u00a0 It\u2019s not knowing that\u2019s scary.\u00a0 Combine that with the undead, and it turns into fear central.\u00a0 With a lot of questions when I try to sleep at night, it\u2019s why I don\u2019t sleep well anymore.<\/i><\/p>\n

Here\u2019s the big question, one I know we\u2019ve all been asking since Infernal Friday set us all on this highway to hell.\u00a0 (Good thing Nick doesn\u2019t read this; he\u2019d start singing after seeing that last sentence.)\u00a0 But it\u2019s a question that\u2019s been plaguing me, the person who always has to have a plan, have an answer, since the beginning.<\/i><\/p>\n

Why did we survive?<\/i><\/p>\n

Why?<\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Saturday, July 7, 2012<\/i><\/b>
\nWeek Eleven<\/i><\/p>\n

The morning didn\u2019t start well.\u00a0 The night had been one of restless sleep.\u00a0 Riley turned over in her bed, seeing Gretchen sleep no more soundly than she had on the other side of the room.\u00a0 The room wasn\u2019t too different from how they\u2019d found it originally.\u00a0 All they had done was remove the pictures of the now undead residents and have Brian and Nick remove the king-sized bed so that they could replace it with two full-sized ones and shift the furniture accordingly, so that everything would fit nicely in the large and airy room.<\/p>\n

Riley sighed, staring up at the ceiling.\u00a0 The past couple nights, she hadn\u2019t slept in there, anyway.\u00a0 Instead, she\u2019d been sleeping with Nick in the most literal sense:\u00a0 fully clothed in pajamas and his arms around her.\u00a0 It made her feel safe and soothed her, despite the distant moans that they could still hear faintly from outside the base.\u00a0 On a night when she feared for the life of a man she now considered family, she\u2019d needed it desperately.<\/p>\n

But of course, that night, it didn\u2019t happen.\u00a0 They\u2019d argued instead about AJ, whose fate awaited them that very morning.\u00a0 Out of fear and frustration with each other, they\u2019d left the ambulance, going back and forth all the way to the house.\u00a0 It had ended in doors slamming, rather than apologies.<\/p>\n

In all actuality, she really hoped Nick was right.\u00a0 She prayed that AJ had somehow survived the night alive and well, rather than dead and reanimated.\u00a0 Still, Riley didn\u2019t regret what she had said.\u00a0 She hadn\u2019t wanted to say it, but her analytical mind had immediately shot to that conclusion the same way Kevin\u2019s had.\u00a0 She rolled over in her bed again, closing her eyes and willing the sleep to come.\u00a0 If AJ turned, he could then contaminate them all, leaving them to the same fate as the rest of their world.\u00a0 And logically, it seemed that was going to happen.\u00a0 Even AJ himself knew it.<\/p>\n

She wished she could be as optimistic as Nick.\u00a0 A small smile came.\u00a0 He was always looking to the brighter side of things.\u00a0 It was an ability she lacked.\u00a0 Not that she was pessimistic\u2026\u00a0 She could be optimistic, if the evidence supported it, so to speak.\u00a0 That was partly why she\u2019d been so drawn to him, his innate skill at always seeing the lighter side of everything.\u00a0 He could be the hope she lacked in her own reality.\u00a0 The smile faded.\u00a0 At least he could be when they weren\u2019t arguing.<\/p>\n

\u201cCan\u2019t sleep either, huh?\u201d Gretchen asked, as she sat up, stretching.<\/p>\n

Riley did the same, finally giving up.\u00a0 \u201cOf course not.\u00a0 How could I?\u201d<\/p>\n

Her friend gave her a sympathetic smile as she put on her glasses.\u00a0 \u201cI know.\u00a0 Brian and I could hear you and Nick arguing downstairs from up here.\u00a0 And\u2026\u201d\u00a0 She trailed off, leaving unsaid what was on both their minds.\u00a0 AJ.<\/p>\n

\u201cExactly.\u201d\u00a0 Riley clutched the pillow close to her chest.\u00a0 \u201cI could\u2019ve used the comfort last night, too.\u00a0 Us fighting just made it all worse.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want to say it, you know that, right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know.\u00a0 No one wants it\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI just didn\u2019t see another choice.\u201d\u00a0 Her eyes shifted downwards to the pale blue, plush carpeting.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t think Nick realizes just how much I want to be wrong for once.\u201d<\/p>\n

The faintest beginning of a smirk could be seen on the former teacher\u2019s face.\u00a0 \u201cHow often are you wrong?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHonestly?\u00a0 This is gonna sound cocky\u2026 not often.\u00a0 But I\u2019d like there to be a first time for everything.\u201d<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Nick was waiting in the living room when she came down the stairs.\u00a0 He looked like he\u2019d slept about as well as she had.\u00a0 He was dressed simply, in a random shirt and jeans, and had his trusty axe in hand.\u00a0 There were lines from the pillow still on his face, his hair wild and all over the place.\u00a0 His eyes were bloodshot, and she could see the bags under them.\u00a0 Still, she smiled.\u00a0 Even though she was sure he was mad at her still, she smiled.\u00a0 These days, it was hard for her to look at Nick and not smile.\u00a0 There was just that quality about him.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook\u2026 I\u2019m-\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201c-sorry\u2026\u201d\u00a0 She blinked.\u00a0 \u201cWhy are you?\u201d<\/p>\n

He shrugged.\u00a0 \u201cI was just as bad as you were.\u00a0 We were both just worried like hell about AJ.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t-\u201d she started, determined to make sure he knew she didn\u2019t want to say what she had.\u00a0 Only that she\u2019d felt she had to.\u00a0 He simply shook his head, his finger softly meeting her lips and silencing her with that one gesture.\u00a0 Nick pulled her close, and she rested her head against him, simply breathing him in.\u00a0 For a moment, the world faded away, simple as that.\u00a0 There were only the two of them.\u00a0 No zombies.\u00a0 No worries.\u00a0 No apocalyptic world.\u00a0 There were just Riley and Nick, and that feeling of peace that shut everything else out when he held her.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou guys ready?\u201d Brian asked, as he came down the stairs, with Gretchen in tow.\u00a0 His voice shattered her reverie and brought them both back to reality.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t look any more rested than the rest of them.\u00a0 His face was worn and tired.\u00a0 Riley pulled away from Nick, nodding to herself, as she reached for the gun sitting on the coffee table, tucking it away.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, let\u2019s go.\u201d<\/p>\n

As they walked outside of their home, they could see the sun just beginning to rise in the distance.\u00a0 There was no noise of birds or any creatures, except for the reanimated ones not that far away from the perimeter of the base.\u00a0 Riley shivered at the thought, despite the humidity already thickening the air.\u00a0 They weren\u2019t alone either.\u00a0 She spotted Kevin, not too far ahead, walking to where the ambulance awaited them.\u00a0 Riley thought maybe she could see the others out by the ambulance, but she wasn\u2019t sure.<\/p>\n

Each step felt heavier than the last, as they trekked the short distance.\u00a0 Nick\u2019s hand reached for hers, and she appreciated the small bit of comfort it gave.\u00a0 Having any, in those times, was a rarity and felt like a gift she didn\u2019t deserve.\u00a0 When they got close, they could see some of the others already there.\u00a0 Howie and Kayleigh were sitting on the sidewalk, chatting.\u00a0 Howie\u2019s arm was around Kayleigh\u2019s shoulders stiffly, in an awkward attempt to comfort the girl.\u00a0 Gabby was leaning against the vehicle, which was oddly silent.\u00a0 Jo simply kept her eyes on her daughter, with the look any bear would have for her cubs.<\/p>\n

They all watched as Kevin prepared to open the doors.\u00a0 Nick stepped forward with his axe in hand.\u00a0 Kevin nodded at Brian and Riley, who both loaded their guns accordingly.\u00a0 \u201cWhen I open the doors, Nick, you hop in.\u00a0 If he\u2019s\u2026 then give a direct blow to the head.\u00a0 No hesitating.\u00a0 If he gets past you, Riley, Brian, we\u2019ll try to take him down.\u201d<\/p>\n

Kevin unlocked the back doors and threw them open.\u00a0 Everyone peered in, and there was no sound.\u00a0 No movement.\u00a0 The air felt stale inside, as Riley leaned in a bit.\u00a0 She wasn\u2019t sure whether to gauge that as a good sign or a bad one, at that point.\u00a0 Nine pairs of eyes met.\u00a0 It appeared she wasn\u2019t the only one to think that way.<\/p>\n

Gabby was the first to vocalize the thought everyone shared.\u00a0 \u201cSo\u2026 is AJ alive or undead?\u201d<\/p>\n

Nick climbed in, and it felt like her heart leaped as he did.\u00a0 Riley found herself feeling the urge to pray, truly pray, for the first time since she\u2019d been a child.\u00a0 As soon as that thought appeared, she could hear Jo murmuring one beside her, a rosary barely visible within her clasped hands.<\/p>\n

\u201cAJ\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Riley climbed up onto the vehicle, to get a better look.\u00a0 While one hand held her position, standing on the bumper, the other had the gun locked and ready to go.\u00a0 She saw Nick creep in further, softly calling his name.<\/p>\n

\u201cAJ\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Nick leaned in, staring at the motionless form Riley\u2019s eyes could make out in the faint light of breaking dawn.\u00a0 Nothing could be heard, beyond some heavy breathing coming from an understandably nervous Kayleigh.\u00a0 He leaned in more. \u00a0She could see the grip on his axe tighten, as he went to examine AJ.\u00a0 They all waited with bated breath for a sign.\u00a0 The wait felt like it took hours, rather than mere minutes.\u00a0 Riley saw Jo pull Gabby close out of the corner of her eye, before she refocused back on Nick.<\/p>\n

\u201cAJ?\u201d<\/p>\n

Nick\u2019s arm raised the axe, ready to slam it down if needed.\u00a0 When Nick\u2019s face was only inches away from AJ\u2019s, the latter moaned loudly.\u00a0 Nick jerked with shock, and Riley did as well, almost falling off the back of the ambulance. \u00a0\u201cShit!\u201d he cried, as he jumped back.<\/p>\n

Riley climbed in, unable to take it any longer.\u00a0 She thought Kevin said something, but couldn\u2019t be sure, as she blocked him out.\u00a0 She ran forward to where Nick was.\u00a0 She was ready to shoot AJ, knowing from the moan that he had indeed gone over to the realm of the undead.<\/p>\n

His eyes shot open.\u00a0 \u201cBrraaaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnssss!\u201d he yelled, causing the two to jump once more.\u00a0 Riley\u2019s own heart felt ready to explode from the surprise alone.\u00a0 A smirk appeared on AJ\u2019s face, as he looked at Nick.\u00a0 \u201cAww, come on, I requested brains!\u201d<\/p>\n

Nick shook his head, tucking his weapon away.\u00a0 \u201cFucking hell, dude!\u201d<\/p>\n

Their companion just guffawed, as tears poured down his face from laughter.\u00a0 \u201cI couldn\u2019t help it!\u00a0 You\u2026 you should\u2019ve seen your face!\u201d<\/p>\n

Riley smacked him upside the head, before moving to release his bonds.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re an ass,\u201d she said sharply, but the hints of a smirk were there as well.\u00a0 \u201cI almost shot you, and Nick almost decapitated you.\u201d<\/p>\n

AJ rubbed his wrists as Nick helped him off the gurney.\u00a0 \u201cThat would\u2019ve sucked.\u201d<\/p>\n

They climbed off the back of the vehicle.\u00a0 Kayleigh was the first to hug AJ once he climbed down.\u00a0 Nick laughed, and Riley guessed it was for the same reason she smirked:\u00a0 Kayleigh looked so thrilled, and AJ looked so stiff, so awkward, and so unsure of how to take it.\u00a0 It served him right, after the stunt he\u2019d pulled.<\/p>\n

Jo went to AJ next, to inspect his bite, and Kevin joined them, talking fast, likely trying to piece things together.\u00a0 Riley wasn\u2019t sure because, for once, she was tuning their conversation out, rather than listening for answers.\u00a0 She glanced around, until her eyes rested on Brian.\u00a0 He looked happy about the survival of the strangest, but most reliable member of their group.<\/p>\n

Riley sighed.\u00a0 \u201cI was wrong.\u00a0 I\u2019m sorry about\u2026 not listening.\u201d\u00a0 She met Brian\u2019s gaze evenly.\u00a0 \u201cYou were right; it\u2019s one thing to kill zombies, but to kill someone else before they\u2026 you know.\u00a0 It\u2019s cold-blooded.\u201d\u00a0 Her hands twisted anxiously.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m\u2026 cold-blooded.\u00a0 But I\u2019m trying not to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s okay.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad I was right, is all.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, me too.\u201d<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

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Chapter 63 If I had to pick one word that defined my entire life, I actually could.\u00a0 I bet people would think that\u2019s weird, to be able to sum up your whole life with one word.\u00a0 I don\u2019t think anyone … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":8,"menu_order":63,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"onecolumn-page.php","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/272"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=272"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/272\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":273,"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/272\/revisions\/273"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dreamers-sanctuary.com\/undead\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=272"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}